I was invited to the Gay Pride Parade Saturday night here in Perth. Peter, a gay man at Loretta's office, invited her and her friends. Loretta's workmate Liz also opted to come along with her three children for some wholesome family entertainment.
The newspaper had predicted a crowd of about 7000 people. I don't think it was that many. But it was still a pretty solid turnout. I got the impression that most people were not there to support gay causes. They were there simply because they were bored and wanted to see something different. Hence, spectators like Liz and her kids.
Peter is a flaming, outrageous homo. He is about 48 years old, if I had to guess. 6'-4", hair bleached blonde with tussled spikes, and a big pot belly. He walks around like a girl, limp wristed and everything. He was married to a woman for 12 years before he came out of the closet. And boy did he come out! I get the impression that he is making up for a lost youth. Personally, I think he is kinda of pathetic. He isn't some cute 20 year old gay boy anymore. He is a late 40's, middle age, has been. Still, he is funny and outrageous has hell.
Peter had managed to secure an excellent viewing spot in Northbridge. He had booked and outside table at one of the restaurants in Northbridge along the parade route. So he and his friends could sit there and drink and smoke and watch all floats go by. So we all joined him there.
I don't know why he was not in the parade. Perhaps he wasn't invited. I don't know. I didn't ask.
I was baffled as to why the parade is being held in late October. Here in Australia, Madri Gras seems have been take over by the gay community. The Sydney Mardi Gras Parade is renowed for being THE gay event on the planet. It held in February or March. I asked Peter why in Perth they are holding this Parade this weekend. Were they attempting to take over Halloween and turn it into a gay pride event too?
No. Peter explained that October is Gay Pride month (who knew?), and this parade is held on the last Saturday of the October to celebrate the end of this month. The fact that it land on or about Halloween is coincidence. They don't celebrate Halloween in Australia anyways, so no one really cares. As he explained it, come November 1st, he has to drop his "pride" and revert to his normal slutty self.
Overall, I thought the whole parade was pretty lame. It started with Dykes On Bikes, Harly-Davidson riding lesbians and their girlfriends perched on the passenger seat. Boring.... next!
They had a float gay men and women dressed as sexy construction workers under the banner "Working for a better community". Then there was a flat of old gay men called "Pink & Gray". There were some other bizarre groups. One was a group of gay men dressed in black leather like wannabe bikers. There was a group called "Teddy Bears", I have no idea what the hell that was about.
Once the freaks who want to share their particular sexual fetish came through, the more mainstream groups came through. These are groups or normal people who are looking to keep their sexual orientation as a non-issue in their own chosen profession. To protect themselves, they form unions such as The Gay/Lesbian teachers, the gay policemen group, etc. They don't go around trying to shock people, or demonstrate how twisted they are.
There was a group from the Australian Labour Party that came marching through carry posters with John Howard's face crossed out. Now this has me totally baffled. What on earth has John Howard, or more specifically, opposition to John Howard, have to do with being gay?
The ALP is similar the the US Democratic Party. John Howard is the leader of the opposition, The Liberal Party. The Liberals are like the US Republicans. John Howard doesn't have anything against gays. So what was that all about?
Then came The Greens Party. They are a fringe party, even more left than the Labour party. What I did not see was a group of gay Liberal Party members make a stand. I wonder why?
I do not understand why being gay means that one has to automatically associate ones self with leftist causes. Why does being gay mean that you support high taxes, bigger government, more welfare, and a weak foreign and military policy? Why can't I be gay, and also support what are normally Republican ideas?
Perhaps it is knee-jerk reaction to the religious right's hijacking of the American Republican Party. Perhaps the gays reckoned they should hijack the other party. Doesn't make any sense to me. I strongly disagree with a lot of the "policies" put forward by the Australian Labour Party, and I can't imagine for one second why who I sleep with would make me change my mind on any of these points.
Further... why would the Labour Party even allow themselves to be associated with this parade? If they are trying to appeal to the average working Joe, how does embracing travesties in skimpy outfits going to help? It just seems to say "We are the party of trivial and non-mainstream freaks".
There was one float I liked. It was sponsored by a local topless bar and featured beautiful girls pole dancing on the float. Loretta and I had an argument about the girls. She felt they were lesbians. I told her that they were not, but they were professional strippers who work there and were probably straight. Why would a topless gentlemans club that caters to heterosexual businessmen be in a gay-pride parade? I dunno. But I liked it. And the nice part... Their girls looked like girls. They didn't look like the tattooed, crew cut, butch "manly" girls that the parade had featured.
There was a smattering of cross-dressing transvestite in the parade. Most were simply dreadful, ugly men looking like ugly women. But there were two that were very good. They were tall, 6'-4" tall men in real life, and about 7 foot with their high heels on. Their dresses were beautiful, and they put a lot of effort into their outfits. They reminded me of the Phillipino transvestite hookers that I met in Hong Kong last year.
The Asian tourist were eating it up. The poor transvestite couldn't walk 2 feet without being stopped by another gaggle of camera laden tourist for photo ops. They were very gracious, and the little Asian women that posed with them were thrilled to death.
That was it. I will give it a miss next year, unless Peter offers to buy me beer while I sit there.
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